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Who would win in a fight?
This is going to be a funny place to have imaginary fights between characters or creatures in the series, or between Wingfeather characters and those from other series or even from outside of books. Every once in awhile, I (or one of you!) can post a matchup, and then we can have play-arguments about who would win. (Not necessarily on Fridays; that’s just a joke from wrestling tournaments and Stephen Colbert.)
First match: Snickbuzzard vs. Squeeblin. GO!
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Sam DurgaThis is tough! The snickbuzzard can snick- as well as buzz!- but I’m not sure if it can do either one before the squeeblin betrays it.
For me, it’s a toss-up between umbilical implications and hidden treachery- and I vote for treachery. But this could totally go either way.
Would there be any handicaps with the snickbuzzard being able to fly and the squeeblin not?
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Noah AikensI don’t think I quite remember the squeeblin. maybe that’s a good excuse to read the series again.
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Noah, yes! Read them again! 😀 (The squeeblin is in the Creaturepedia, though, which is maybe why you don’t remember it from the series.)
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Okay, new matchup: Quill diggle vs. horned hound. Who will win?
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Peet the Sock ManQuilldiglle
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Noah Aikenshorned hound
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Miss MaryHmmm, this is a good one. I think it might depend on the specific ones of each species, but in general I would suspect the quilldiggle will come out on top. The reasons I suspect so are that while horned hounds are extremely ferocious and determined, and have that dangerous horn, they still have the major weakness of their kind known in our world…that sensitive nose…a few well aimed quills and suddenly the quilldiggle is not such a fun prey after all.
I also suspect if they lost these matches frequently then we would never know about quilldiggles at all since they can be found in the same areas. They probably would have become extinct long before now if they couldn’t defend against horned hounds.
Of course, I don’t see them winning on the offense either. They just aren’t made for it. They can’t chase down a horned hound and make it surrender to them! So if the hound was not on the offensive I think it would be a draw.
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Butterbread, or bread-and-butterflies?
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RebeccaBread and butterflies
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The TerrethianThe baker always wins!
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EliaI would like to see the rest of the fight between Janner and the Quill Diggle. Or how about a Bomnuble vs. a small Sea Dragon?
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Elia, great ideas! Especially the bomnubble vs. dragon—wow.
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JaidenI would like to see a fight between a squeeblin and a ridge-runner. That would be amusing.
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cadwicki sometimes play a game like that with friends on a car ride called epic duels. its where you pair two movie characters and tell what weapons they have and then decide who would win. its fun.
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Would you rather wrestle an alligator, or a daggerfish?
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Elia TysonI think what Madame Sidler is trying to ask is whether you would rather be chewed to death or stabbed to death. As for me, I think I’ll just steer clear of rivers and swamps all together.
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RebeccaMaybe a daggerfish lol
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DannibyWhat about Bilbo (young-ish) VS all the fangs in Glipwood?
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Toklaham VeruziaIf there were a lot of Fangs, Bilbo could possibly trick them into killing each other. Or maybe light a fire and summon all the beasts in GLipwood to come eat the Fangs. I don’t see how he could win in a straight-up fight. Hobbits aren’t renowned for their fighting skills.
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By “Fangs in Glipwood,” I assume we are talking about the less-clever Green Fangs? I think Bilbo would have an easier time with them than with Grey Fangs.
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RebeccaToo late now he’s thin and stretched like butter over too much bread
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RebeccaUm would you please taking my last name off that? Sorry and thanks . Ugh autofill is invented by ridgerunners! Lol
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Done!
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RebeccaThanks 🤗
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The TerrethianI think Bilbo would just escape from the Fangs, not fight them.
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Miss MaryI am not completely sure who would win this… I am betting that Bilbo would though given his advantages of Sting and most importantly a certain ring.
The Fangs of Glipwood have the advantages of numbers certainly, but numbers can become a disadvantage if you can’t stay unified and work together. And historically the Fangs of Glipwood are not particularly good at teamwork even without invisible enemies. Add a burglar who can creep silently and invisibly just about anywhere and they would REALLY get into fights.
His main risk would be that someone would run into him or squish him by accident while fighting with each other. No way to be sure to avoid every collision in a crowd…and toothy cows and other wild things are still a problem…and he has never seen them before.
Bilbo wins…unless he goes home for supper before they are all gone.
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Elia TysonKylo Ren vs. The Florid Sword.
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Ha!
That is tricky, because while the Florid Sword would probably leap down from a roof and therefore have the element of surprise, he also knows when he’s overmatched and feels no shame in dashing off and picking up the fight again later in another way. What would happen if the fight started to go in Kylo’s favor? Would the Florid Sword stick it out? And if he did, would he regain the upper hand?
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Toklaham VeruziaUnless the Florid Sword had an opportunity to upgrade his sword to a lightsaber, he’d be at a severe disadvantage due to being incapable of parrying Kylo’s blows. Kylo Ren could also use the Force to throw things, shoot lightning or choke his opponent, so he’d have an additional advantage. However, he also has an ugly temper, so the Florid Sword could probably provoke him into acting rashly. If they were on the streets of Dugtown, the Florid Sword would have a better understanding of the terrain and could dash away, then launch a surprise attack later. But if they were fighting on an Imperial ship, he wouldn’t stand a chance.
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Sara CoblerA skreean bomnubble VS a symian bomnubble
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Sara CoblerFrom Pembrick’s Creaturepedia
Bomnubble (Skreean)
Weakness: None. Unless you count its appetite, which was my salvation that day in the den, for it woke from its restless slumber, sniffed the air, and set out for more munchables, which allowed me time to make my escape.Bomnubble (Symain)
Weakness: Napping. Sunshine. Sailing, evidently.-
No weaknesses for the Skreean Bomnubble! I suspect it would have an advantage over the comparatively relaxed Symian Bomnubble.
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Vekka YoungbeastAgreed. Symain bomnubble, it is
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Vekka YoungbeastThis is a fun idea! Can we resurrect it?
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Absolutely! Do you want to start us off? 🙂
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Vekka YoungbeastOh! Well, um… Lessee…
6 Grey Fangs vs. a Toothy Cow
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CelidahI must agree with Tolkaham. I don’t see how 6 smart, sentient Gray Fangs wouldn’t outwit a toothy cow. Now multiple toothy cows, on the other hand…
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Toklaham VeruziaThe Grey Fangs have sentience, so they could plan ahead and trap the cow.
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I.LThis doesn’t have to be on Friday… Does it?
Water-horse vs Sea-dragon
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Nope, any day is fine. 🙂 Good matchup!
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Isaac Loyd🙂 They were pretty similar, so it would be interesting to see which one.
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Peet the Sock ManSea Dragon
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Vekka YoungbeastToklaham, Celidah — Welllll I haven’t read it in a long time so…….
I.L. — I immediately thought sea dragon, but then again I don’t know what a water-horse is -
ColsonWhat about Artham or Legolas?
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CelidahOooo, Arthram vs Legolas is a tough one. If, theoretically, it were a fight to the death, Legolas could probably track & shoot Arthram out of the sky. I don’t think Arthram would be faster than Legolas’s arrows. But a friendly spar is a much tougher call.
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The TerrethianBut then, why would these guys fight?
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CelidahLike I said, maybe Legolas & Artham would do a friendly spar? Legolas couldn’t use his arrows if so, though. Or maybe he could carry the finest Elvish Nerf arrows.
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HannahIt would depend on if Peet maintained his sanity throughout the fight. If not, he’s dead. Or if it’s windy. Cause if it is, Peet can still claw Legolas to death, but Legolas would be completely vulnerable, because he wouldn’t be able to shoot straight. Under perfect weather conditions… I have no idea (my sister says they would get bored, because they are evenly matched).
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Colsona group of Sea Dragons or Smaug?
As mush as I love Sea Dragons my bet is on Smaug 🙂
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Isaac LoydYeah, Smaug could blast their heads while they are trying to snap at him. And he is more experienced at flying, even if it was after the fourth book.
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CelidahTrue, but if a swarm of sea dragons were attacking Smaug, could he really hit them all before being overwhelmed? (Disclaimer: I haven’t seen the Desolation of Smaug, so I have no idea what movie Smaug is like in action.)
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HannahBut is this fight in water or on land? Cause I don’t think Smaug would win in water. Swimming, at least.
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Peet the Sock ManSmaug
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Toklaham VeruziaSmaug seems quite inefficient in Desolation, seeing as he (mild spoiler) fights the dwarves for 30 straight minutes of film and doesn’t manage to so much as scar a single one of them.
It’s probably better to consider Smaug’s fighting capabilities by the way he’s described in the book. 🍿🍿😏
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ColsonWhat about J.R.R Tolkein on a Warg or Andrew Peterson on Nugget!
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Vekka YoungbeastHa! Um… Maybe the warg. But then again, I’m no expert on LOTR
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That is an amazing mental image. XD
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CelidahI have nothing to add to this thread except that the mental image of Tolkien & AP going at it on a warg & Nugget respectively is cracking me up.
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Peet the Sock ManA.P on Nugget
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I.LThe warg would have an even chance with Nugget, whereas Nugget succeeds the warg in size and strength, the warg has more ferocity than Nugget, and if it gets close, could rip the trachea out easily. I have no idea on this one, it probably depends on the weapons that A.P. and J.R.R have. Like if J.R.R has a orcish crossbow, and A.P. has a hollish-hammer, J.R.R would win. And if A.P. has the florid-sword’s sword and J.R.R has a hobbit-sling, A.P. would win.
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Noah AikensIn the pictures I have seen of Tolkien, AP seems to be in much better shape. But I really want Tolkien to win because he’s just such an awesome writer. But then again Tolkien would probably despise us for thinking he may ride a warg.
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HannahAre Nugget and the Warg doing the actual fighting, or is it reliant on the riders? And would AP be able to maintain his focus, or would he be too giddy?
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“…if it gets close, could rip the trachea out easily” and “In the pictures I have seen of Tolkien, AP seems to be in much better shape” made me laugh so hard, you guys. XD
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The Friendly WordsmithMay I remind you that Nugget took down a troll, killed dozens of fangs, and has Leeli to fight for (that one is big). The warg, although ferocious and terrible, is going to have less strength, maybe less speed, and only has dark hatred to fight for. Also Nugget hunted both horned hounds and toothy cows with ease.
To say that a warg could easily rip out Nugget’s trachea doesn’t seem right. When someone is fighting for love, they can fight in ways that darkness simply can’t. Nugget died fighting for love, and as I said, he took a troll and many fangs with him.
Fisticuffs I.L. to say such things! I know you and I know your voice… Beware…
And yes, Tolkien would loath riding a warg, but for the sake of argument, I will analyze. Andrew Peterson is by no means withered, some might call him fit. Tolkien was in his forties (mid to late) in the first stages of writing LOTR, but remember that he was also military, which means not to be trifled with.
So let me say this. I think Andrew and Nugget have the upper hand, because of Nugget (mainly). The warg is a lesser creature, and has less to fight for. Tolkien might have the upper hand one on one, but with Nugget, I’m afraid it wouldn’t count enough.
-The Friendly Wordsmith-
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I.LThree Bat-fangs vs Two fishy Stonekeepers
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That’s tricky! They would be able to evade each other pretty easily, but would they fight in the air or on a ship or on land? Do they have weapons?
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ColsonThorin Oakensheild or Gammon?
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I.LGammon would, Thorin is a good fighter, but he is easily susceptible to sneak-attacks, as shown in the Battle of Five Armies (I’m not sure if he would lose as easy if it was the Thorin in the book). Gammon is used to using hiding places and ambushes, so he would win.
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Peet the Sock ManThrorin
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LeeliHow about Narnian tree people VS a bomnubble
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I.LDryads vs a bomnubble?
Depends on how many dryads, and it also depends if the bomnubble has an axe, so it can cut down the dryads.
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Peet the Sock ManWhat about Andrew Peterson on Nugget v.s. Rick Riordan on a toothy cow.
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Brighton Nelson1. Andrew Peterson on Nugget, obviously.
2. Why would Rick Riordan ride a toothy cow?
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Brighton NelsonBatman vs. Artham P. Wingfeather
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Peet the Sock ManArtham
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ArthamFlorid sword vs anakin
Anakin without the force and florid sword with a lightsaber-
Ooh! Now that is intriguing!
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The Friendly WordsmithThe Florid Sword is by far the better duelist. And Anakin doesn’t know how to stay cool while he fights, FS does.
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ArthamWhat if they have shadowblade and ahsoka?
And the lightsabers can’t just cut up the swords and daggers -
ArthamI noticed a lack of narnian characters in the fights so how about
Reepicheep vs 1 grey fang
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ArthamI think reepicheep would win because the grey fang would laugh at a mouse chalenging him then reepicheep would out-fight him
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The Friendly WordsmithGO TEAM REEP!
A point I have made before, is that there is something to say about fighting for love. Reepicheep has something to fight for that the fang can’t comprehend. All the fang wants to do is be evil, but Reep is fighting to Aslan, and everything Aslan stands for. Besides I think he’s also a better fighter than most any fang.
-The Friendly Wordsmith-
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ArthamI agree with everything you said
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ArthamHow about: jewel (the unicorn from last battle) vs a toothy cow
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The Friendly WordsmithThat’s a tough one.
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ArthamI think jewel would have the long range advantage
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ArthamHow about:
Percy jackson vs kalmar
On land and kalmar fanged
