Have you ever had skittery, somersaulting thoughts like this? I have.
Janner’s heart somersaulted with shame, embarrassment, envy, frustration at himself, contrition, gratitude, and then more frustration. As soon as he settled on one feeling, the next one crowded it out. He sighed, wishing he could rest and let things be as they were. He felt as if he were two people: one boy who saw the situation objectively, who knew the right answers—which were to be content with his lot, grateful to the Maker, humble to his calling—and another boy whom he hated, who felt things hotly and demanded attention like a child throwing a fit.
Even the good feelings betrayed him, because once he felt them he was proud of having them, which opened the door for the next multitude of conflicting emotions.
No, he would think. … Be glad… He would settle for a moment, even breathe a sigh of relief. Then like a rat in the kitchen, a dark thought would skitter across the floor of his thoughts.
—From chapter 89, “The Maker.”
This is our second-to-last Friday for the Ban Rona Book Club! What snippet did you love best this week? Post it in the comments! And if you’d like some conversation (about the above passage, or anything else), come on over to the forum.
Have you had a chance to catch Andrew on his tour? He’d love to meet you!