“I don’t care what color it is!” This exchange cracks me up every time I read it.
“So why did you come?” Claxton asked Jimbob, though his eyes were still fixed on Maraly.
“The Fangs say they need our help.” Jimbob’s voice trembled. “They say that if you don’t come and fight, they’ll treat us like all the other Dugtowners.”
“Is that what they said,” Claxton muttered, turning his attention back to Jimbob.
“But you told us we didn’t have to fight nobody!” one of the Stranders said. “We don’t fight for nobody but ourselves! You told us that!”
“Aye, you said we just had to hide here until the fightin’ was over! We ain’t nobody’s soldiers.”
“And you said we’d get some cupcakes!”
“Quiet, all of you!” Claxton roared. “First of all, the cupcakes were fer the ones who came with me to Snoot’s. I said I’d try to bring ye back a few. I’d try. Ain’t that what I said, Poggy?”
“Exactly,” Poggy said. “And even us that went didn’t get none.” Maraly noticed her face was smeared with bright yellow icing.
Others noticed it too. “What’s on yer cheeks?” one of them shouted.
“It ain’t icing. It’s—it’s water.”
“Sticky yellow water?” said the second man. “Poggy, that makes no brains!”
“Quiet, I said!” Claxton bellowed. “Forget the cupcakes! If ye want some, we can get ’em tomorrow after the Fangs have run of the place again. Second of all, no, we don’t have to fight. Jimbob here’s going to send word back to the Fangs that he found us fighting the Dugtowners out in the mudfields to the north. It’s all part of me plan. He’s gonna tell ’em how brave we are, aren’t you, Jimbob?”
“If it means I can get one of those cupcakes tomorrow, then yeah,” Jimbob said, rubbing his hands together. “I’ll tell ’em anything.”
“Can I have a dip of some of that yellow water on your cheeks, Poggy?” the first Strander asked.
“Nobody’s eatin’ cheek water!” Claxton shouted, banging his fist on the wall. “I don’t care what color it is! Now listen,” he continued in a conspiratorial tone, “we just have to hide here and keep quiet. The Fangs will do their battling, my mammy will keep bringing me soup, and in the morning”—Claxton thrust out his chest and beamed—“I’m the King of Dugtown. Actually, I would like a nibble of that goop on yer cheek, Poggy.”
—From chapter 32, “The Weaver Family Reunion.”
What about you? Do you have a favorite excerpt this week? We’d love to hear it—just post it in the comments!
Thoughts, questions, gripes, wild speculations, and Florid Sword impersonations are all welcome in the forum. Head on over, and bring a friend. I’ll see you there. 🙂
By the way… this is happening today. 🙂